What Comes Around Ch 22 bit – Token Evil Teammate

“Ladies, gentlemen, students!”

I want to kill him, Callimachus thought darkly, eyeing Simon’s back as they all stood before the auditorium of assembled teenagers. Well… maim at least. I doubt I’d have much luck with “kill”. Not with his warriors around him

Although Ja’far had a slightly pinched look around his eyes Callimachus was coming to recognize as the Life magician’s own “must maim later”. Why was he not surprised?

“I hope your Labor Day weekend was as much fun as ours,” Simon went on. “No, don’t wake those three up, they’ve earned the nap. Especially not you, Dash. If you’re lucky you’d only wake up Aladdin and get plastered to the ceiling. If you’re not you’d half wake up Alan and that would be fatal. At least to your uniform-”

Ja’far poked him.

“As I was saying,” Simon sailed gallantly on, “last weekend was… busy. Interesting, but busy. You may have noticed the tower is currently missing. We’re going to work on that, because now that we’ve figured out the time distortion possible inside there is no way I could survive a concerted attack by our local geeks and magicians determined to fight for extra study time.”

Over in the shadows of the stage, Callimachus saw Yunan clap a hand to his face in disbelief.

Why? The chance to study time distortion… I wonder how it affects the moments of astrology? If the stars here are what matter, that shouldn’t change them, but if stars there make a difference – dear god, what if that’s one of the reasons behind errors in natal charts? If you have to account for rising stars that aren’t visible from Earth….

“I honestly haven’t come up with a summary yet of everything you probably want to know about what happened,” Simon said bluntly. “Let’s just say, if you think you see us putting up certain… defenses… around Hancock, you’re right. Some of my people managed to run into some very unpleasant individuals from an even more unpleasant family, and if they’re not smart enough to take our warning to back off, your teachers are taking measures to be sure they will not be disrupting class time. One way or another. And speaking of unpleasantness….” He waved at the alchemist.

Gritting his teeth, Callimachus inclined his head to the assembled youngsters.

“Stay calm, Magister,” Phaenomena murmured at him from the stage wings. “They can smell fear.”

Hah. As if I’d be afraid of high school students.

Then again, these were Cavins’ students.

“Everyone, this is Mr. Carl Marks,” Simon announced, drawing on one of Callimachus’ more well-grounded identities. “As far as the Department of Education is concerned, he’ll be teaching physics, astronomy, and a few other interesting subjects. As far as you’re concerned – he is assigned to be menacing!”


“You might consider him our newly-hired Snape,” Simon went on.

I’m going to kill him.


28 thoughts on “What Comes Around Ch 22 bit – Token Evil Teammate

  1. Callimachus as Hancoock’s resident Snape analogy is just perfect. Look on the bright side Magister, at least it’s not Disney.


  2. Will there be billowing robes? What is a Snape, without the gravity defying clothes? Or a Kaiba, but he’s not involved here… yet.

    You know, those particularly colorful characters would mix in… interesting… ways with the resident lunatics…

    Liked by 1 person

      1. >No billowing robes. Everyone expects sorcerers to have robes. That’s how he’s managed to stay under the radar! >
        Not to mention billowing robes can catch of knock things over. And when you’re experimenting with magic, this is a BAD thing.

        Liked by 1 person

  3. (I had JUST checked this going “its Bit time, why isn’t there a Bit? Because I am well trained at this point.)

    *evil cackle of glee*

    No, Callimachus, you can’t maime Simon, even if Ja’far would really rather help you right now. Though the “ooh shiney” at the thought of studying the time distortion and astrology of the Dungeons is adorable.

    Students, let the Weird Trio sleep. They’ve earned it and you’re still delicate. You are not yet prepared for details. Rest assured that poking this ant hill resolves in fire, lighting, and various levels of bodily harm.

    Is Phaenomena in charge of sass? I bet she’s more than urned her doctorate.

    Poor Yunan, you’re craking already with so much more Simon Insanity to go. (He’s gotten /better/ this life, but he’s still reincarnated Sinbad.)

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Was getting edits done before Bit posting. 😉

      Oh man, the look on those three’s faces when they find out what Simon has in mind for Dungeon Monitors… *G*

      I strongly suspect Simon is curious to see how much he can poke Yunan before the magi realizes he’s not quite the same guy. 😉

      And have some fun Bleach inspiration. 😉

      Liked by 1 person

  4. Oh dear. Now there may be fangirls… I have no idea how Callimachus would deal with fangirls, aside from blaming Phaenomena for the fact that the term is even in his vocabulary. (Finds a good corner to watch the torment unfold, where no one will mind the maniacal cackling)

    Liked by 1 person

      1. I would love to see that! Although Phaenomena might be savvy enlighten to realize that Ja’far is much better fangirl bait, and throw him to the wolves while she runs off with her alchemist…


  5. Eh, while he has his issues, I wouldn’t put him as bad as Snape. He has a healthy relationship with his partner. And wanting to maim Simon is a sane reaction he doesn’t seem the type to take out on students.


  6. >>I’m going to kill him.>>

    Ja’far: “Join the club, we have jackets.”
    Ja’far: “Get in line.”
    Ja’far: “Congratulations, that feeling means you are officially one of us.”
    Others (chanting): “One of us, one of us . . .”

    Or all three eventually . . . because I’m pretty sure Alan will want to maim him once he discovers he has been assigned as “Dungeon Monitor.” Yes, he understands that the people capable of doing that are very limited so it wasn’t like he had a choice but still . . . .
    “You could have asked first!”
    “But I’m supposed to be high-handed and arrogant” *wink*
    “Argh!” *considers asking Ja’far and Ba’al if either would be mad if their king was lightly flame-broiled.*

    I like our alchemists going nerd moment. It’s cute . . .

    And why is he even surprised by this stuff? You don’t have to be around Simon Cavins long to determined he is awesome, crazy, crazy awesome, and one of the most annoying people on Earth. And part of the reason he is annoying is that he is right so darned often.

    And besides, didn’t anyone show him the school’s motto? Or are they saving that to watch him facepalm?

    Liked by 1 person

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