Some Recipes for the Tender of Stomach

More accurately tender of gut, but who’s counting?

Everybody’s stressed lately. Good food is one way to keep up morale. But that can be tricky if you have food sensitivities. A persnickety gut doesn’t exactly make for thrilling writing. Though it can keep you from writing, either by reducing your concentration, actually messing with your brain, or a host of other annoying symptoms. I apparently have not just gluten sensitivity but an actual wheat allergy; eggs don’t like me either. Here’s some stuff I’ve found that works anyway.

Great Value Gluten-Free Brownie Mix.

Yes, the inexpensive one you pick up from Walmart. I’ve tried at least a half-dozen different brownie mixes, some not at all cheap, but none of them worked as well as this one. It does have two problems: It’s too sweet, and it’s not chocolate enough. And I need to get around the egg called for. I solve these by adding:

One 9-ounce bag of Enjoy Life Dark Morsels (melt them in with the butter).

¾ cup of cocoa.

3 tbsp of sour cream, to make things moister given I’m using a serving-cup of applesauce to substitute for the 2 eggs. (About ¼ cup of applesauce per egg.)

This will take a little longer to cook than the recipe calls for, and you might want to do the extra 5 minutes or so about 25 F lower so you don’t scorch the top. It’ll also take at least a few minutes cooling down to solidify. It is very chocolate.

Namaste Foods Spice Cake Mix

Good, but spicy; tastes better with a bit of sour cream on top to tone the spices down. I haven’t tried the “add shredded carrots” variation yet.

Gluten-Free 101: the essential beginner’s guide to easy gluten-free cooking, by Carol Fenster.

I’ve only tried a few recipes out of here so far, but the pizza recipe works. (You have no idea how many GF pizza crusts I’ve tried. I had one that worked but then the company reformulated it and included pea fiber. I get along with pea fiber even worse than eggs!)

The only caveat I’ll add to this one is, the crust may need to be cooked a bit longer than the recipe says before you put toppings on and cook it again. Ovens vary.

Other recipes in here that work:

Oven-Fried Chicken, though I used yogurt rather than buttermilk.

Chicken Fingers; again, I used yogurt rather than cold milk and an egg.

Carol’s Gluten-Free Flour Blend.

Planning on trying more recipes out of here now that I have all the ingredients for the flour blend. Unfortunately I can’t get them all local; while neighborhood markets did have things like xanthan gum and tapioca starch, brown rice flour and potato starch I had to order online.

If you also have problems with garlic and onions (very common in non-celiac gluten sensitivity), in a lot of recipes (say, for taco meat, or jambalaya) you can substitute chili powder with equal amounts of oregano and cumin, and some cayenne added for heat.

And a neat trick for hamburgers I ran across a few days ago: sprinkle salt and cayenne generously on each side before cooking. (If starting with a frozen hamburger, cook long enough on one side to thaw the meat slightly, turn, sprinkle, repeat, then cook the rest of the way.) This results in a spicier but also juicier hamburger; really noticeable difference if you’re starting from frozen burgers!

19 thoughts on “Some Recipes for the Tender of Stomach

  1. If eggs make you sick, then it might be the eggs. Whenever I have eggs, at best I feel slightly queasy all day, sometimes into the next day. Then I was at my Aunt’s house helping her out. She offered me breakfast, in the form of some fresh eggs from her flock of chickens. I declined, they make me sick. Then she mentioned that it might be the eggs themselves, so she thought that duck eggs might not make me sick. She also has a flock of ducks, so I tried the eggs. No issues at all. After that, she mentioned that it could be the diet. Apparently if chickens are fed an organic, GMO free diet they don’t make people as sick, or not sick at all. The next day I had chicken eggs, still slightly queasy, but not anywhere near as bad as when I normally eat eggs. Both flocks were fed the exact same feed. Some people get sick from all eggs, some only from chicken or duck.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Duck eggs are pretty nice.

      IIRC from the last time I had them there’s more yolk in proportion to the white, and the shells are more… elastic?.. than the shells on chicken eggs.

      Liked by 1 person

  2. If you can do cream cheese, you can substitute 2oz of cream cheese per egg and make “cookie dough bites” from most any recipe. Need to “cook” the flour, and you can of course leave out levening agents.

    They’re very good for keeping in the fridge.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. https://www.smithsonianmag.com/science-nature/ancient-european-hunters-carved-human-bones-weapons-180976570/

    My apologies for the blatant off-topic, but Smithsonian has an article about 10k-year-old barbed bone blades found on the shores of Holland. Turns out they were all red deer, aside from a couple that were human. This ‘obviously’ means they were cultural/religious.

    Because that’s what it always is, right?

    Anyone know some hunters or other specialists who might know what barbed bone tips would be useful for? Or, for that matter, why they’re showing up on beaches now?

    -Albert

    Liked by 2 people

    1. So technically hunting would be part of their culture, right?

      “It’s a cultural tradition to create bone weapons, kill prey, then barbecue it. It’s a very popular tradition.”

      Liked by 2 people

    2. I’m pretty sure barbed spear tips go with fishing spears. When you are hunting a large land mammal, cutting the tip for strength makes sense. Fish you spear hunt are probably smaller, and you would want a way to more easily and reliably get the fish out of the water.

      But those would only be ceremonial, because the populations in the area at that time were strictly pacifist vegan.

      As for showing up now, solar cycles are bringing us into Fimbulwinter. Artifacts will wash up from Doggerland, Atlantis and Ry’leh rise, and North Africa and West California sink. Batman will fall into battle against Superman, Harry Potter versus Gandalf, and Wencit of Rum qualifies to be summoned as Caster or Saber.

      Obvious shitposting is still more useful than CNN.

      Like

      1. Correction: fall in battle against

        And, obviously we are in the second year of Fimbulwinter. 2020 didn’t have a summer, because there was no end to the winter cold.

        The lockdowns will continue until April 2022, when all reigns are overturned.

        Liked by 1 person

  4. Rutabagas and turnips and parsnips are still in the store! And they’re yummy in the oven, if you can eat root vegetables!

    Yeah, the sudden “pea protein” and “pea butter” craze is almost scary. I can eat peas just fine, and pea butter is a fine medieval Lent food, but I don’t think everybody wants to eat legumes all day and night.

    Liked by 1 person

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