River of Stars Ch 9 bit – mission report

“What the heck does that thing do? Besides turn zombies to ash. Which is very cool, but not going to look good on the mission report.”

Daniel scrolled down a bit more, and sighed. “What I’ve got is, ah, more poetic description than anything specific.”

“Hit me,” Jack shrugged, casting a glance sideways as Sam sat up straight, and felt one of the pages between her fingertips again. That glint in blue eyes was a certain astrophysicist sneaking up on an idea, and it’d be a lot better if they didn’t bother her and chase it away. “Maten first?”

“It’s supposed to rule over evil and yin,” Daniel summed up. “Supposedly it breaks the darkness, whatever that means. And it’s – oh. Neat. Tenkai wasn’t a one-time thing. Traditionally the Maten is held by a youkai Sanzo.”

“Which would explain some of the give them what they want and pray,” Jack quipped.

Daniel raised both brows in disbelief. “Jack, we really haven’t met enough normal youkai to know how cranky they are yet.”

“Oh, no,” Jack agreed mildly. “Just, the priests seem to think our Sanzo’s doing a swell job.”

“Point,” Daniel muttered. “Okay… Seiten, holiness and yang. It has the power to bring forth the light.” He shook his head. “Don’t ask me how that’s different from breaking darkness. But it’s usually held by a human Sanzo. So is the Uten; that one’s supposed to deal with life and existence.”

Jack grimaced. “Does what’s in there say if that Sanzo is dead?”

“If – oh. Right. Kanzeon said her human Sanzos died….” Daniel peered at one of the documents. “Urgh. Yeah, he’s dead alright. Very. Ow. There’s a cross-reference to a report by our Sanzo in here. It’s… wow. These guys have almost as bad a record with fortresses as we do.”

Teal’c shifted in his chair, obviously interested.

“Really short version? Cross-dressing scorpion youkai ate the Uten Sanzo, tried to eat our Sanzo, poisoned him, and the rest of Sanzo’s team dropped a fortress and half a desert on his – her? –  head,” Daniel summed up.

“Cross-dressing scorpion youkai,” Jack repeated. Because damn. “We have got to bring that report to Hammond.”

“I think there were bloodstains on the original.” Daniel squinted at the screen. “There’s also some kind of reference to Prince Kougaiji getting his ‘everything broken’.” He read a little farther, and shuddered. “That… really doesn’t look like one of their more fun missions.”

Ooof.  “Aging cake not-fun, Neanderthal virus not-fun, SGC about to get sucked into a black hole not-fun?” Jack waved a hand. “Gimme a scale here.”

“Neanderthal virus is close,” Daniel said after a moment. “Though there’s something in here about stopping a desert from swallowing whole villages, so… yeah.”

“They faced the youkai prince who serves Gyokumen Koushu,” Teal’c noted. “If we successfully negotiate a truce with Kanzeon Bosatsu, it is likely we will encounter her forces attacking us as Kanzeon’s allies. Is there more information on Kougaiji’s followers?”

“In this report? Not much,” Daniel reflected. “Sha definitely wrote at least half of this, there’s all kinds of… really bad words about Dokugakuji having the decency to help Kougaiji pull them all out of the sand-trap and then standing behind his clan lord when Kougaiji challenged them to- oh. Ow.”

Teal’c frowned.

Daniel blew out a breath. “Sanzo was poisoned. Hakkai was trying to keep him alive. Apparently Kougaiji usually travels with his own healer, a youkai apothecary named Yaone. But she wasn’t there, and when Sha asked for help….”

“Fight me to get it?” Jack guessed.

Daniel blinked. “How did you know?”

“Hey, I’ve seen a bunch of warrior honor cultures in my time,” Jack shrugged. “On Earth and off. I’m guessing something went wrong, though, or Sha wouldn’t have left in the insults. So, what?”

“Um. There’s… not much in the way of details.” Daniel’s gaze flicked over the text. “Just one sentence, really. Goku took his limiter off.”

“The limiter Sanzo says has to stay on,” Jack said, just to be sure.

“Right.”

“The thing that keeps youkai from going crazy where Koushu’s zatarc-thingie is projecting stuff,” Jack went on.

“Right.”

“When his foster parent – the guy Kanzeon says Furling kids need to stay sane – was dying,” Jack finished.

“…Yeah.”

“Do not play games with the funny crown,” Jack concluded.

“No,” Daniel agreed. “There’s an additional note a few days later-” The archaeologist stifled a laugh. “Jack? Sanzo’s got your report style down.”

Jack raised an eyebrow, oddly cheered.

Daniel cleared his throat. “Came out of coma, searched sand with sutra, Uten poof, assume Koushu’s got it. Damn bastard Kougaiji. Damn idiot monkey.

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38 thoughts on “River of Stars Ch 9 bit – mission report

  1. Since RoS is going to be crossover with Around one (glorious) day when will Sanzo enter a dungeon and get a djin. I mean he’s empathetic, cares about his followers, and the universe just *loves* to throw its problems at him.

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      1. Yeah that is true, sadly, and even if he was willing I don’t Sanzo could get a djinn due to be a sorta magician and djinn not working well with those. Also while I might not know stargate from what you write I imagine Jack would shoot anything that tried to get in his too.

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    1. It’s going to be Kougaiji who gets a djinn. He’s the one who has the loyalty of the youkai, the household of devoted friends, and the consistent desperation for more power to protect his people.

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  2. >Damn idiot monkey.” >
    Unsaid (though Kanzeon knows what he really meant) is: ‘for making me worry like that’.

    >“There’s also some kind of reference to Prince Kougaiji getting his ‘everything broken’.”>
    Kind of an indication of the potential difference between Youkai and pure-blood Furlings.

    I mean Kougaiji is probably in the upper tiers of Youkai, and never wears a limiter.
    And yet Goku, a relatively untrained and adolescent Furling handed him his ass on a silver platter.

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    1. Sanzo definitely wouldn’t say that, no. (But he did. Darn monkey.)

      Don’t get the Seiten Taisei angry. You wouldn’t like him when he’s angry….

      And yep. My bunnies say there’s a reason the bit Tok’ra remember about the Furlings is OMG Run away!

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    2. Yeah, but, and keep in mind I did see that episode ages ago, how much of that was because Goku is generally a goof ball and the Unexpected Rage Ball of Doom did the, admittedly remarkable, feat of knocking Kougaiji off his game? On the other hand, Goku wasn’t really home anymore. If anything, I’d almost say that Goku ended up as what Nataku was supposed to be. Oh, hey, since we know that souls can splinter in RoS, and we may be looking at a crossover with Around (I don’t remember if you’ve said yet whether that will happen or not) and we know that a person’s rukh can bolster another’s (Hi, Cassim) does this mean that part of Nataku latched onto Goku?

      Or am I going crazy? Always a possibility.

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      1. *Wry G* I wrote Around as a potential cross with the SG ‘verse, not River specifically. Though I’m thinking about it.

        There was an element of surprise, yes, but Goku then proceeded to beat down everything else, as well. Ouch.

        (Except Sanzo. Because poison or no poison, Sanzo is not getting his ass kicked by a bratty monkey, and that’s that.)

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      2. Part of it is when Goku’s limiter is off? He goes for everyone there, and he Does Not Stop (unless his limiter is put back on – which can only be done by a kami or Sanzo, canon). Also, canon (so may not apply in RoS), Goku was born from the earth. He heals and regains strength by being in contact with the earth when his limiter is off. Meaning nothing can stop him but his limiter as long as he is in contact with the earth.

        That’s why his limiter was removed when Ukoku shot him, and why Hakkai had to lift him off the earth to let Gat’s weapons have any chance at stopping him.

        So while the “healing is rapid and constant when in contact with the earth” may very well not apply in RoS, the Will Not Stop For Anything (But His Limiter) does. Doesn’t matter how much damage he takes.

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      3. I’m not sure “in contact with the earth” directly applies in RoS, but I am leaning toward “Furling abilities are stronger in a living magnetosphere”. So… yeah. If Goku’s on the ground and his limiter is off, they have problems.

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    3. >And yep. My bunnies say there’s a reason the bit Tok’ra remember about the Furlings is OMG Run away!>
      Which would only make them die tired unless the Furling had better targets.
      Of course assuming the Furling can teleport even getting on a ship won’t help.
      Furling simply ‘ports into the engine room (or similarly important area) and proceeds to start playing ‘how many vital components/systems can I destroy in the next 30 seconds?’

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      1. Which makes me really wonder how the Goa’uld finally swatted them, given there aren’t any Furling adults apparently left.

        …Bunnies are wondering if that was an Ancient screwup, too. After all, Wraith. Tumor gun. The track record speaks for itself….

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      2. >Which makes me really wonder how the Goa’uld finally swatted them, given there aren’t any Furling adults apparently left. >
        I suspect that at least part of the Goa’uld’s tactics involved burying the Furlings in bodies. After all you throw enough mud at the wall, eventually something is going to stick. That and the FUrlings have limited energy reserves.

        Of course when in doubt, commence orbital bombardment while the Furlings are occupied with the (highly expendable) ground troops.

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  3. I knew idiot monkey was in that report somewhere. *EG*

    Jack sees nothing wrong with his report style. It’s short, to the point, and not a lie. That it tends to give his superiors the occasional frothing fit is just a bonus.

    Have to agree with Vathara that Sanzo’s reaction to the idea of contract with a Djinn would be a loud “NO!” with gunfire for emphasis despite having the right temperament and such – he’s got enough on his plate with Kanzeon, sutras, snake queens and her minions who need to be sent permanently upriver, lighting fires under lazy priest butts, the monkey foster child, the very homicidal idiot, the occasionally homicidal idiot, and his-yet-to-be-sprung-on-him-second-foster-child and all the nonsense those things entail . . .

    My bunnies have also been munching on the possibility, if the Hancock crew ever goes to Shangri-La, of them picking up strays? And not just talking about wyverns who think they’d make nifty flock-mates. Just that given all the nonsense happening, there must be a lot of orphans of various ancestry running around and we all know that Alan is a magnet for hard-luck cases (not that Simon is any better in that regard – must be a king thing . . . well, it is trouble and they are the fixers of trouble . . ). Plus they are going to need more kids for the elementary school – and to continue Yunan’s punishment for endangering their people / their king (depending on who you ask).

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  4. Daniel cleared his throat. “Came out of coma, searched sand with sutra, Uten poof, assume Koushu’s got it. Damn bastard Kougaiji. Damn idiot monkey.”

    Short, blunt, and expletives. Expected. But… Poof? The thought of that coming out of his mouth strikes me as damn hilarious.

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  5. I was just rereading “River of Stars Ch 2 bit – meeting Koumyou” which had this line “had to turn the clock back, for a time. Don’t worry, you’ll grow out of it.”: Amusement tickled him. :“Which almost seems a shame. You’re adorable when you’re asleep.” and I just realized that you foreshadowed Kid! Sanzo (that sounds so wrong) planned from the start. There is absolutely no way the old had doesn’t have pictures of that. *G*

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  6. Sanzo is not affraid to hit a girl, and DOES NOT APPRECIATE attemted eatings and successful poisonings. (Or his monkey going off the rails and making him WORRY.)

    Kougaiji is very lucky he got his everything broken instead of catching a bad case of death. (It was still a close thing, if I remember correctly.)

    Do Not Mess With the Funny Crown, indeed. Forget that the funny crown comes off if you value… anything. (Life, being in one piece, your insides not outside, etc.)

    Teal’c… I can’t tell what Teal’c is thinking, but I see it happening.

    Sam is sneaking up on that idea of hers. I wonder how much this conversation helped.

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  7. The fact that the words ‘Goku took his limiter off’ summed up the end of that report should be making the hairs stand up on the backs of their necks. “Do not mess with the funny crown” should be the understatement of this century. As mistakes go, taking off Goku’s crown should rank up there with putting Morgan in handcuffs.

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    1. And that was before they got memories back. I imagine that Alan is even touchier about the handcuffs now.

      But yes, the summation of a blood spattered, profanity ridden report being one sentence should be something to be wary of. Especially since, if my memory is accurate, since Goku ripped into Sanzo before Sanzo got a chance to reform the limiter.

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      1. Whoever that armorer was needs a raise then, because Goku in Sage Mode doesn’t really pull punches. Didn’t Kougaiji end up in Ni’s hands after that fight? I think it was after an encounter with Goku in Sage Mode, he was severely damaged, and so far that’s the only thing I can think of that would let that happen…

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      2. >>And that was before they got memories back. I imagine that Alan is even touchier about the handcuffs now.>>

        Why do I have the horrible feeling that some idiot is going to try it? Only to see the previously mild-mannered blonde teenage trying to avoid a fight go berserk . . . (not coincidentally giving said idiot and any watching audience an object lesson in the difference between can’t fight and rather won’t fight . . .)

        And is it mean that I can think of a few people whom I think need that kind of thumping because they have a bad habit of not understanding that no means no . . .

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  8. *cackles8 Love Sanzo’s report, and I think the SG1 just have a bit more respect for what Sanzo and crew can do. Especially what lengths Goku will do to keep Sanzo alive and safe.

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      1. *snickers evilly* Okay, here’s another thing that absolutely has to show up in a sequel. 😉 And with Sanzo having diplomatic immunity – it would be interesting if MacKenzie tried to pull this on Shangri-La – there can be no charges laid! 😉

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  9. I’d reccomend a resident Badass Preacher. Someone like Maikel Staynair from the Safehold series by David Weber(Shelfbreaker books-DoorstopperX2).

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